Hmmph! I would like to call myself a birthday Pysch. Why ? Because as my birthday nears, I go psyched up. No literally. There’s no stopping of my anxiety level. No! I’m not worried about the party I will be attending(psst, there’s no party for me! Its just a simple family gathering and going out for lunch!)….
I go from usually happy jubiliant me to oh-no-oh-no stressed me. Why? Because it starts reminding me of what I couldn’t do what I couldn’t be and what I couldn’t see over the active years of my life (psst, I’ll be 33 this year and somehow this number also stresses me out!!)
I go into the “psych” mode of my incomplete to-do list…….
So much <xyz> not done…..!??!!!
So much of world not seen…….?!!!???
So much of this thing.. so much of that thing … not done……?!!!???
What have I been doing???
The list never ends. I stress myself so much that the eve of my birthday i absolutely do not have mood to do anything…
Dwell on things that happened and not happened in the past……
And the list never ends………..
Sorry, but such things have been a part of my “birthday” ritual since I turned 30(I cried hard when I turned 30, no shame in agreeing to it).
But this time, I came across few things to not break me. Not by birthday, not anytime of the year. Here are the things I keep reminding myself (since I’m reading a lot these days and many pointers to keep myself “sane” (!))
- From Marc and Angel (so much of calm words, so much positivity that can make anyone calm down…)
To quote them ~~
Dale Carnegie once said, “It isn’t what you have, or who you are, or where you are, or what you are doing that makes you happy or unhappy. It’s what you think about.”
So with that in mind, here are 20 ways to stay unhappy forever. Of course, Marc and I would highly recommend you read each bullet point and then move swiftly in the opposite direction.
- Dwell on things that happened in the past.
- Obsess yourself with all the things that might happen in the future.
- Complain about problems instead of taking the necessary steps to resolve them.
- Fear change and resist it.
- Work hard, do your best and then condemn yourself for not achieving perfection.
- Belittle yourself.
- Hang out with other people who belittle you.
- Try to control everything and then worry about the things you can’t control.
- Lie to yourself and those around you.
- Keep doing the same thing over and over again.
- Be lazy and follow the path of least resistance.
- Hold onto anger. Never forgive anyone.
- Always be right. Never let anyone else be more right than you.
- Compare yourself unfavorably to those who you feel are more successful.
- Let small issues snowball into big problems.
- Never learn anything new.
- Never take responsibility for your own actions.
- Blame everyone around you.
- Don’t ask for directions and don’t ask questions.
- Don’t let anyone help you.
OK, now that you know what not to do, let me tell you a secret about happiness. Nobody is happy all of the time. It’s perfectly normal to experience considerable fluctuations in your level of happiness from day to day, month to month, and even year to year.
One more that’s apt for my situation is the below post. Very nice article and very nice tips to keep in mind…
2. From Crystal Paine (she is huge inspiration)
2 words – “Choose Gratitude”… It says everything…
Be thankful for the things you can achieve and done and for the life you have now.
3. “I’ve Done” list is always good than “I’vent done” list
Like the below that I’ve done (inspite of having full-time job)–
- Blogging frequently
- Reading books
- Able to spend good time with my baby and family
- Guest writing/Freelance writing at Polka café admist my hectic schedule
4. The below list to motivate myself wherever I am – picked from various Google sources.
- Instead of giving yourself reasons why you can’t do something, give yourself reasons why you can
- Always, one step at a time.
- Failure is temporary.
- It can only get better.
- Action is a better regret than inaction
- Discipline feels better than regret
- Every day counts.
- Willpower is all in my head
- I’m better than I was yesterday
- I can do anything
Q: have you been there where everything outside, around you just is all okay but something inside you all breaks down…?! And how have you achieved inner calm and peace?!? I would like to know and get more inspired, please drop a comment, I would to hear from you….